Cold Water.

It is such a difficult decision. I need to work things out, talk over, decide, convince..

Swim team starts this coming Monday & I have so many conflicting emotions. Does my family want me to? Getting up at 4 Am for 4 days a week is pretty exhausting. 19.5 hours of my week dedicated to swimming back and forth, and back and forth.

But, I've done stuff like this for years now. It would be weird to just not show up one day. Wouldn't it? Or would it?

This is what is going through my mind when I try to decide if I should sign up for swim. I don't want to let my swimming friends down. To drop out of a family I am so closely bonded to.

But, I have to do what is best for me as an individual. I need to do things that will look good when signing up for art school to work in fashion. Taking a few extra sewing or art classes instead wouldn't be so bad.

I have to make up my mind and my families mind tonight. Stressed? Yes. Excited? Yes. Ready? No.